User blog:Kirimisakana/How encouraging words.

Some critics say "Kirimisakana, the self-calling translator is too judice to translate Japanese lyrics. She is tend to exchange word to word, mistake grammarly or in word-choice." How encouraging words ... I need your help.

Original lyrics  http://piapro.jp/t/Blhb

My translation http://piapro.jp/t/QHhA

Below is my second attempt. (I got full permission from original author.)

"South wind memories"

The rainy days depressed me

I want to walk under the bright sunlight

Abruptly, I remember your face

Why I feel so lonely?

I must stop thinking too much



We had a quarrel at last time

I said hurtful things to you

In the gentle breeze, you give me a smile

I smile at you gratefully

Let's enjoy the summer wind

The sunshine and the sea

<p style="margin-top:10px;margin-bottom:0px;white-space:pre-wrap;color:rgb(51,51,51);font-family:'lucidagrande',tahoma,verdana,arial,'hiraginokakugothicpro',meiryo,'mspgothic',sans-serif;line-height:17px;">

<p style="margin-top:10px;margin-bottom:0px;white-space:pre-wrap;color:rgb(51,51,51);font-family:'lucidagrande',tahoma,verdana,arial,'hiraginokakugothicpro',meiryo,'mspgothic',sans-serif;line-height:17px;">Although we are apart,

<p style="margin-top:10px;margin-bottom:0px;white-space:pre-wrap;color:rgb(51,51,51);font-family:'lucidagrande',tahoma,verdana,arial,'hiraginokakugothicpro',meiryo,'mspgothic',sans-serif;line-height:17px;">I can remember your suntanned skin, breadth of your back and pressed shirt.

<p style="margin-top:10px;margin-bottom:0px;white-space:pre-wrap;color:rgb(51,51,51);font-family:'lucidagrande',tahoma,verdana,arial,'hiraginokakugothicpro',meiryo,'mspgothic',sans-serif;line-height:17px;">

<p style="margin-top:10px;margin-bottom:0px;white-space:pre-wrap;color:rgb(51,51,51);font-family:'lucidagrande',tahoma,verdana,arial,'hiraginokakugothicpro',meiryo,'mspgothic',sans-serif;line-height:17px;">“I didn't expect to see you here.”

<p style="margin-top:10px;margin-bottom:0px;white-space:pre-wrap;color:rgb(51,51,51);font-family:'lucidagrande',tahoma,verdana,arial,'hiraginokakugothicpro',meiryo,'mspgothic',sans-serif;line-height:17px;">I say

<p style="margin-top:10px;margin-bottom:0px;white-space:pre-wrap;color:rgb(51,51,51);font-family:'lucidagrande',tahoma,verdana,arial,'hiraginokakugothicpro',meiryo,'mspgothic',sans-serif;line-height:17px;">Why we behave like a fool?

<p style="margin-top:10px;margin-bottom:0px;white-space:pre-wrap;color:rgb(51,51,51);font-family:'lucidagrande',tahoma,verdana,arial,'hiraginokakugothicpro',meiryo,'mspgothic',sans-serif;line-height:17px;">Please tell me about you I want to know how you were going

<p style="margin-top:10px;margin-bottom:0px;white-space:pre-wrap;color:rgb(51,51,51);font-family:'lucidagrande',tahoma,verdana,arial,'hiraginokakugothicpro',meiryo,'mspgothic',sans-serif;line-height:17px;">I want to tell about myself

<p style="margin-top:10px;margin-bottom:0px;white-space:pre-wrap;color:rgb(51,51,51);font-family:'lucidagrande',tahoma,verdana,arial,'hiraginokakugothicpro',meiryo,'mspgothic',sans-serif;line-height:17px;">I remember about the quarrel that we had

<p style="margin-top:10px;margin-bottom:0px;white-space:pre-wrap;color:rgb(51,51,51);font-family:'lucidagrande',tahoma,verdana,arial,'hiraginokakugothicpro',meiryo,'mspgothic',sans-serif;line-height:17px;">but we can smile at each other

<p style="margin-top:10px;margin-bottom:0px;white-space:pre-wrap;color:rgb(51,51,51);font-family:'lucidagrande',tahoma,verdana,arial,'hiraginokakugothicpro',meiryo,'mspgothic',sans-serif;line-height:17px;">We truly enjoyed summer vacation

<p style="margin-top:10px;margin-bottom:0px;white-space:pre-wrap;color:rgb(51,51,51);font-family:'lucidagrande',tahoma,verdana,arial,'hiraginokakugothicpro',meiryo,'mspgothic',sans-serif;line-height:17px;">

<p style="margin-top:10px;margin-bottom:0px;white-space:pre-wrap;color:rgb(51,51,51);font-family:'lucidagrande',tahoma,verdana,arial,'hiraginokakugothicpro',meiryo,'mspgothic',sans-serif;line-height:17px;">Did the summer breeze bring you here?

<p style="margin-top:10px;margin-bottom:0px;white-space:pre-wrap;color:rgb(51,51,51);font-family:'lucidagrande',tahoma,verdana,arial,'hiraginokakugothicpro',meiryo,'mspgothic',sans-serif;line-height:17px;">“I didn't expect to see you here.”

<p style="margin-top:10px;margin-bottom:0px;white-space:pre-wrap;color:rgb(51,51,51);font-family:'lucidagrande',tahoma,verdana,arial,'hiraginokakugothicpro',meiryo,'mspgothic',sans-serif;line-height:17px;">I say but I feel happy

<p style="margin-top:10px;margin-bottom:0px;white-space:pre-wrap;color:rgb(51,51,51);font-family:'lucidagrande',tahoma,verdana,arial,'hiraginokakugothicpro',meiryo,'mspgothic',sans-serif;line-height:17px;">

<p style="margin-top:10px;margin-bottom:0px;white-space:pre-wrap;color:rgb(51,51,51);font-family:'lucidagrande',tahoma,verdana,arial,'hiraginokakugothicpro',meiryo,'mspgothic',sans-serif;line-height:17px;">The sunshine and the sea

<p style="margin-top:10px;margin-bottom:0px;white-space:pre-wrap;color:rgb(51,51,51);font-family:'lucidagrande',tahoma,verdana,arial,'hiraginokakugothicpro',meiryo,'mspgothic',sans-serif;line-height:17px;">Sky is blue and clear

<p style="margin-top:10px;margin-bottom:0px;white-space:pre-wrap;color:rgb(51,51,51);font-family:'lucidagrande',tahoma,verdana,arial,'hiraginokakugothicpro',meiryo,'mspgothic',sans-serif;line-height:17px;">We can have straight talk

<p style="margin-top:10px;margin-bottom:0px;white-space:pre-wrap;color:rgb(51,51,51);font-family:'lucidagrande',tahoma,verdana,arial,'hiraginokakugothicpro',meiryo,'mspgothic',sans-serif;line-height:17px;">Let's enjoy the summer wind

<p style="margin-top:10px;margin-bottom:0px;white-space:pre-wrap;color:rgb(51,51,51);font-family:'lucidagrande',tahoma,verdana,arial,'hiraginokakugothicpro',meiryo,'mspgothic',sans-serif;line-height:17px;">I look forward to making new memories

<p style="margin-top:10px;margin-bottom:0px;white-space:pre-wrap;color:rgb(51,51,51);font-family:'lucidagrande',tahoma,verdana,arial,'hiraginokakugothicpro',meiryo,'mspgothic',sans-serif;line-height:17px;">

<p style="margin-top:10px;margin-bottom:0px;white-space:pre-wrap;color:rgb(51,51,51);font-family:'lucidagrande',tahoma,verdana,arial,'hiraginokakugothicpro',meiryo,'mspgothic',sans-serif;line-height:17px;">If there are any mistake or awkward words, please let me know. The critic also says "We have many example of J-POP lyrics translation. Why didn't she check it?" I'm eager to know where it is, too.