User blog:Angel Emfrbl/At this point I'm glad...

This is the whole thing... I've retold the tale of 2010 many times, it always seems to sad for me, because I was the one who had to roll up their sleeves and muck in. Consequences is, I lost touch with the One Piece wikia and find it now impossible to just return there. This wikia used consumed a lot of my week at first, and I had an awful lot of trial and errors to do to see what worked and what failed. I've said it before I have NEVER done a wikia like this.

I got frustrated with the folks at VO forums, because everyone must have thought I wanted to be the be "I Am" of Vocaloid, which has never been the case. I was just a passionate fan who was frustrated about the situation in 2010 and did what was needed. When no other fan would lift a finger to do things, I just jumped in a wrote about the things they refused to write.

I was scared to death when I got the big cheese status after request a new admin to do things after the original suddenly died out on us, and its not my favourite memories. I am pretty outspoken, due to frustrations with Wikipedia and I have always been afraid of putting my own opinions over others, so having power made me totally afraid.

After the events of the MF, I realized that I couldn't handle that status, nor the stress of dealing with VO forums. Remember, it was VO forums that lead me to edit in the first place, I broke my Wikipedia boycott over them. So for me, I felt let down by the "veteran" community, as it went back to the original reason I started editing; because they would rather bitch about the fandom then help it. Likewise, trying to fix the Mf problem by explaining why fans thought every Vocaloid looked like Vocaloid, while trying to explain that the CV series DID influence a lot more then they were accepting... While I thought this was going to be common sense and pretty obvious stuff, that they wouldn't care much about it. Instead, they completely an utterly proved themselves no better then the newbie fans they criticized by reading things the wrong way.

And this is what woke me up back in 2011 to the problem. I wrote a blog either this year about how some think I'm a "know it all", and I'm hurt whenever this happens because it goes against my actual character of who I am. I know a lot of things, but I don't know most things, what I know might be wrong from time to time, but I'm only human. If I read things wrong or mistake information, like anyone else I will show it up. But I've always been put down by the greater Vocaloid community more then many whenever I do make mistakes, which is why MF was such a hard thing because the people who put me down during the event the most, they were the ones who made my life harder prior...

I said it before in the past, "when a newbie makes a mistake, its naivety... When a veteran makes a mistake, its ignorance".

Some of the veterans are now mellowing out and starting to accept things as they are, but I'll never understand why our first 2 or so years were such a hard one to live through. Bias still exists, but its not such as big of an issue due to tolerace to other Vocaloids occurring... And when vocaloid moved into other languages, things towards English Vocaloid mellowed out, especially when Japanese vocaloids got Englished. However, I'm still cautious of how their popularity leads many fans to believe their better then some of the newer ones are. But as I said also in the past, the trouble with English Vocaloid is we have Sonika...

I'm beginning to look at other wikia projects as this is what I do, after a wikia is established I move on, I'll still be filling in the blanks from time to time until I've comfortably found the next project, and unlike when I tried to quit in 2011, I can finally do this at my own pace which means when it happens, the same thing will likely happen with me and the One Piece wikia and you won't see me around that often.

As for real life goes on, I'm 30 this year and I'm woring towards a career now, so my time is getting lesser and lesser. Most of the time I can find time for wikia editing such as general research only on weekends. :-/