User blog comment:Kirimisakana/How encouraging words./@comment-24.113.181.56-20130825060509

Note that this is just commenting on your English, I don't know anything about the original lyrics.

Since you seem to be writing it all in present tense, the first line should say 'depress' instead of 'depressed'.

The fourth line needs 'do'. "Why do I feel so lonely?"

The fifth line is technically correct but it sounds odd. "I need to stop thinking so much." sounds more natural.

Sixth line should be "we had a quarrel last time" no 'at'. Or maybe try "we fought last time". Quarrel is a bit of an odd word to use in everyday conversation.

"I said hurtful things to you" is technically correct, but 'hurtful' isn't used much by most English speakers. Try 'rude', or perhaps 'thoughtless'.

"Why we behave like a fool?" should be "Why do we behave like fools?"

"Please tell me about you I want to know how you were going" doesn't make complete sense. "Please tell me about yourself" is fine, but the second part doesn't sound right. Do you mean "I want to know where you were going?" or perhaps "why you were going"? Or "I want to know how things are going" to refer to difficulty level or emotions.

"I remember about the quarrel that we had" can drop the 'about' and 'that'. "I remember the quarrel we had."

"but we can smile at each other" would sound nicer in context if you add 'still'. "I remember the quarrel we had, but we can still smile at each other."

"Sky is blue and clear" should have 'the'. "The sky is blue and clear."

"We can have straight talk" sounds odd. Maybe try something more like "we can have a straightforward talk".