Hello! I would like to ask that you please not add stuff like this to your userpage. With that being said, I hope you are okay. Committing suicide is not the answer and if you are in danger, call 911 or your local equivalent. Otherwise, I urge you to take advantage of these suicide prevention resources: Help:SPR.
The good thing is, you are at a place where people tend to be good at finding stuff. We can help with information finding, but the problem is we can't do much more.
If you need to talk about stuff though, I can't stress go onto a private chat with a staff member here and talk about things.
As someone whose witness a close family member go through with it this year and having considered it myself at least once in my life, talking may not 100% help... But it takes pain and helps ease. I'm not the best at it, but I do treat suicide as quite serious of an issue and all I can do is encourage to listen to Akumi or come and talk to the staff in private or seek help.
Don't take the removal the wrong way... The problem arises from people who abuse the system, use suicide to pull at heart strings and get sympathy. It lightens a serious issue for those who do suffer.
But as someone whose been there... All I can say is life does change and often gets better. But... If you go through with suicide, you'll never know if it can. Tomorrow your entire life can change, and believe me, it did for me about 8 years ago. I must admit I had a good sulk this year on the 8th anniversary because I couldn't remember what its like to live in the old way I used to live, the one driving me to the ground. It always makes me sad to see someone else in this position, because I have empathy and have been there you know.
Plus on top of it someone close to my family also topped themselve this year so... I can say for sure from seeing both sides of the situation what can happen.
So yeah, talk to someone, believe me, it helps a lot.